man_flame

Identifying Issues:  WN Inferno

Been reading Dante again, I am certain there will be more to come  on this theme- http://librivox.org/the-divine-comedy-by-dante-alighieri/ for the audiophile

http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/8800   Text online

Problem I : The Over-Usage/Constant Focus on Daily Crime Stories- That stuff is never going to end as  long as we must share space with the Others. There will never be a dearth of NW crime stories, of things we can find that  illustrate the work of our Enemy, against our quality of life-our biological life, and life itself period. Those stories may have a place, but continually dwelling on them and looking for them I do not believe is productive. I don’t see that there is much of a new angle in telling people stuff they already know. What it may look like to outsiders is that we are obsessed with NW crime, or finding NW crime.They know it’s there, everyone knows it’s there. Bringing attention to a particular heinous crime , the media who  try their best to non-report non-PC crimes that don’t fit the Rainbow Feelgood Coalition’s agenda of trying to make it appear that   poor (especially)  blacks  as a rule, don’t  tend to dislike , resent, envy, and yes, even  hate White people. We all know that is bullsh*t of the highest order.

 Correcting those who try and warp statistics to fit their  agenda, and write about the victims using lullabye-like terms like “just happened” and “isolated incident” and “wrong place at the wrong time”  as if  we were Little Red  Riding Hood in a forest on the way to grandma’s, and the Big Bad Wolf appeared!…that  is  a good thing. 

 The thing that is not helping us is the  obsessive and continual chronicling of the daily , never-ending NW crime.  At any given time, one can put a word into  a news search engine and come up with http://news.google.com/news?hl=en&resnum=0&um=1&tab=wn&ie=UTF-8&q=rape I don’t  know that doing this ad infinitum is getting us anywhere. It may provide some  bizarre  kind of therapuetic “venting” , but to the outsider? It makes us appear “unhealthy”, mypoic- A problem is concentrating only on the negative, regardless of whether it is true- without a counterbalancing effect of  examples of victories, advancement, things We do every day that are good. We cannot afford to  winnow all of what we are down to either being angry or victimized.  

 I know  some people may not appreciate my speaking against  constantly citing these stories, but  doing so attracts people with an axe to grind against life in general , makes us look one-dimensional , and I believe may keep away new people who most likely already are well acquainted with these crimes.

We have to ask ourselves, what good things do we have to offer people? What benefit is it  to them to join us? We know the answers to these things and think they are obvious to them, but they are not. They are still thinking small , and probably only interested in protecting whatever they have. They  are not going to want to be around us , or be associated with us if ALL we  seem to do is  harp on the obvious.  We have to give them more than that. We owe them more than that. We owe what we claim to hold sacred, our future, our children’s future , more than  an endless chronicle of victimization.

Problem II : Lunatic Fringe ?

Those who are in it for the racism rather than our goals. 
I know people may not get what I mean by
‘in it for the racism’

Even the made-up word ‘racism’ does not even mean what it used to.

   ‘racism’  AKA anger, frustration, resentment, betrayal by govt, etc) as something completely reasonable and justifiable, not as fringe or extremist or against ‘social justice’ , etc. Not so long ago, people did not see the need to dress up or  feel the need to overuse epithets, because these beliefs were  a given.
. It is part of  the ‘reactionary racism’, ( term suggested  by “son of liberty”  on SF) and I think it is limiting us.
This is not about going soft. On the contrary , it is about not being a joke, stereotype, or  having people  think we hold the beliefs we do just for the ‘fun’ of it or because we can. 

No.

We  don’t believe  as we do  for  “the Hell of it”.   We believe  these things because of the Hell of it- Hell   being   the liberal ,multi cult, enforced political oxymoronic correctness, the TV telling us who the bad guys are, and what groups are untouchable and protected above all, what we are forced to live with, what is done to us.

 

         There are some people who do both, make a lot of noise and believe in our people and our future,  the  ‘noise’ mostly because they probably don’t know what else to do, or lack the resources to come up with something different.. Like a kid who is desperate for attention, they will get it by acting out if they can’t get it any other way. Should this be rewarded?  No.
The whole argument of ‘this person or that person isn’t doing anything “. I am afraid just doing ‘anything’ isn’t going to cut it with what we are up against. 50-60 years ago, we would never have dreamed we would be in the position we are in now- the miscegenation, the endless banging-head-against-the-wall programs that never work, the looking-the-other-way re illegals, the disgusting television . Well ,the television we might have predicted to go down the road it has, but perhaps not to this extreme,  the lies of what came to be known as “feminism” but did everything but celebrate woman as she is, the glorification of the androgynous, castrated White male, the encouragement of  generation upon generation of delaying children , the result  being one will almost certainly never have any real recollection of one’s grandparents. 

Problem III :Lost Generation(s) ?

It bothers me to think about it that way, that many will be basically lost to us, having forgotten who they are, having parents who did not even instill the basic stuff of our people into them. It is beyond the race-mixing, the wigger clothes, the rap music. As just *people* , they are throwaways. They have no purpose, no depth, they are made up of an amalgamation of myspace, rothstein tv, the mall, junk food, daycare- everything in them comes from outside. It is all made-up, fairy tales that instead of teaching people about good and evil, teach that neither matters. Kind of likethe  body snatchers. There might be the rare few who will sense the hollowness of that empty , at once selfish and self-loathing existence and defect, but most won’t. They will be even worse than the lemmings my age.

On Getting “Better People” 

Someone used this term to me , I believe as a compliment in reference to the type we are looking for. Well, ‘better’ is as ‘better’ does. Let’s face it, not everyone is going to be able to do everything, but they are able to do something to contribte. Will they be happy with that? I don’t know, but I plan on being straight with people re this. Sometimes it isn’t even the actual person themselves that helps, but rather their connections. I have been the recipient of this before, and have been impressed with the friend of a friend.

When  one says ‘better’ , it has to mean all the way through, not *only* what  tasks they can perform and particularly not, say, their social class, whether they have  a PhD-  This is kind of like equal opportunity employment but for white people.

Was thinking about this kind of thing today, about how people are considered for various jobs and what people look for as I was shopping for a   decent mic, and heard the tech store person talking  about applicants.
Some only look for what turns out to be quite small stuff in the the big picture., or what can help them today, and not see further down the road , not just that they can do such and such for me.

I am not the Army, and  I’m not looking for people to use for whatever immediate  purpose and ‘throw away’, I am looking for ones I can keep.

If what I am saying makes sense to you, please  see more here :

http://www.stormfront.org/forum/showthread.php/wn-new-direction-new-approach-414203.html

Achilles Briseis, back to war in the morning

Digtal Art: Achilles and Briseis

Taken from stuff from 24th and previous , (some I have said on various audio/radio)but was posted in a private area- thought I would add it here and expand on it (it is mine, I did not paste what the others said-therefore I do not violate anyone’s “private area” terms)

White Suprivilegacy

“The goal of abolishing the white race is on its face so desirable that some may find it hard to believe that it could incur any opposition other than from committed white supremacists.” Noel Ignatiev

No , Noel. Even non-committed White Supremacists along with regular garden-variety white people think that is a sucky idea. Go back to the black section of Harvard where you hang out and worry about trying to get the blacks to think you have their best interests at heart. ( http://www.vdare.com/roberts/harvard_genocide.htm)

 

 

A Real future doesn’t exist with White kids living a nightmare with other White people who don’t know or remember anything about us. As I said before White = Civilization and Civilization = White. If we become uncivilized, through whatever means, TV, war, corruption- we then lose what is a huge part of being White. We then lose our Whiteness by default, even if we are White by biology , we *can* lose it- we will have lost what it means. I am afraid we might be of the last generations that are living that do remember this, as opposed to kids who will only read (and less and less of this) in books of our history, of what we have achieved, of what we have yet to achieve. People also talk about “losing their ‘Whiteness’ ” or “abolishing Whiteness”. They say they are talking about ‘privilege’, but we know they are not. “Privilege” is yet another one of those code words, as if skill and creativity, ability- all the things we can do were simply granted to us through an Whiteness Express “rewards” program.

“hey you spent 500 bucks this month, would you like some extra creativity? or would you rather some higher math skills ? ”

“Cliff Notes” version : Being Uncivilized Really Blows. Keep Whiteness.

Multi-Cult: Witnesses for their own Prosecution

When you hear someone say ” well I know this black (or whatever) and they are ok, they arent like the stereotype” but they don’t think it through as far as the whole- just like when the antis go on forever about white serial killers “well so and so serial killer was white”.. and they also dont look at the bigger picture. they have to point out the tiny # of the worst to prove our worst, and they also have to pick out the tiny % of “OK” minorities to prove their best, missing the point that the rest of the pie means that Most whites are Ok and not serial killers, but a LOT of minorities are trouble of one kind or another. When a WN or an anti places a minority in that “look here is a special case” scenario, or a white in the serial killer scenario- that only serves to prove our point. We don’t want to be abolished, outsourced , continually mocked and derided on TV, encouraged to imitate celebrity mating patterns, guilt-tripped for not adopting a rainbow family. encouraging our teenagers to dress like retro insane asylum patients emulate MTV/ghetto patois/fashion.

The Velveteen Rabbit

The closer and more into WN you get, the narrower the focus of the lens becomes as you “close in” – one discovers what one truly seeks and believes- it either becomes more Real or more unreal. One starts to be able to discern where there is style over substance. After a few years , this narrowing of the focus can lead to needing to pull back, change perspective (not ideologically) but simply take a break-and/or make sure you have other things that bring you happiness, however simple or small.

Government Excuses/Betrayal/Society

It almost seems as if that word “society” exists in the past tense- this is no “society” . When our president weakly says “can’t do anything about it, there’s too many” , yet can spend billions on war, do we trust this? Do we believe him that we cannot do anything? I don’t. He means : “I will not do anything, all energy and resources are going to the war, and besides, the illegals make money for big business, (stuff i have stock in) while you (the taxpayer) foot the bill. Why should I change anything?”

The White outsourced software guy, the White outsourced construction worker, these are like the forgotten children of a first marriage- and they are resentful, no matter how “tolerant” they claim to be, all they see is Dad doesn’t care. You hear Kanye (whatever his name is, whatever he is famous for) say about the Katrina victims: “George Bush don’t care about black people”.Well guess what Kanye? He “don’t care” about White people either! Neo-Con, Zionism, look it up my man, check it ooout!

We may not see it in our lifetime, we may not see the end of whatever this is but we are certainly seeing the decline. In the case of what has happened to us, White people we have started to lose sight of who we are, and in some cases, become a mockery of ourselves.
Do you think anyone who would seek to conquer us now would keep much of what we have become? In this way, our’decline” is not like that of the Empire. We were conquered by other Europeans. This produced a much different result than what will happen here. Hence a greater need for investment in preservation, the passing down of traditions, culture, our own education.

Fighting WN Stagnation/Apathy

Because anything that has the focus of “white” has now become verboten, some of this will be underground, say if I were to start a school or the like -but regardless of the scale, it can be done on some level- some can certainly be above ground, since the focus will not always be on what the others (NW’s) are doing or not doing.
There are new people coming to WN all the time, some , like myself, were probably always nationalists at heart- will hear Pierce or read stuff here and say “Well, yeah ,of course! This philosophy is considered ‘bad”? Everyone I know feels this way, perhaps not publically, but it is there nonetheless”..Because it makes SENSE. Others maybe came from the other side, having lost faith in the liberal propaganda/programs that yield zero results.

Why people don’t care, why our own don’t want to do anything– it is harder and harder to just deal with normal life- or they choose the “normal life” over caring about bigger things. The whole “if it doesn’t affect me, why should I care?” Apathy: “I can’t do anything and neither can you”. The nay-sayer doomsday advisory committee: “I know more than you about this, you dont know enough” “you’re too old/young” “you arent doing it the right way, here is the right way” “you’re a woman, so you dont really count”…”we’ve tried something like that, and it didn’t work with so an so doing it, so you too will fail”
and so on. So you listen and nod, and keep going anyway. If your goal is to help your people, and the reward is in the work itself, you have not failed. The failure is in the things decribed above.

Defense/Offens(iveness)

More and more people are becoming more afraid of what the world around them is turning into than of villification/social ostracization. When I marched on the capital in Sac last Nov. a woman perhaps close to my mothers age came up to me , she was sympathetic to the illegal problem, yet started in criticizing about the skinhead clothes/boots/dress etc.. I told her, “look , these are the people who care, you may not care for their look, but your belief is not so far from theirs. I don’t see the average type person out here willing to protest. You see this perception of them, but they are normal American boys, and they care about what is happening, as you do , as I do”. She was at a loss for words for a moment and then of course started in about Nazis .
I then told her “there really isn’t any other cultural expression currently available that says, ‘hey, Im White, proud, and unafraid to show it.’ This is their expression of that. They aren’t here hurting anyone, they are here protesting a real problem. Now, is it these skinhead kids that are a huge problem that really affects your life, your kids lives-or the swarms of illegals”…She just kind of nodded and repeated the same stuff about how she agrees, just doesnt like the style, but it was clear I had made my point.

White Rehab

We are above the animals, ( I would like to think at least some of us are) , and above the Evil of our Enemies – Now if we take on these ways- what I quoted from Nietzsche in the forum:

And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

This can happen, like staring into the sun-one becomes blinded-if one takes too much medicine, one becomes poisoned. Back to the Problem of Evil.

We know what the (Code word) “societal ills” are, we know where they come from.

What would the “White corollary” to that be? something not based on primitive or animalistic nature. It would have to be something more sinister. Of course one can say that is also inherent or “natural” in the Enemy – “naturally ” pre-disposed to commit usury,money schemes, deception, hypocrisy, self-hate and hate of others not of themselves, degradation of the good. That is not pathology in their case, that is “doing what comes naturally”. As I said, people can be forgiven for what they do, less likely so for what they are. Yes, good people make mistakes. Bad people make mistakes too, but often less unintentionally.
It is what one does with motivation and opportunity.

Cliff Notes Version: The Enemy has a special talent for taking the good, destroying and debasing it.

In reply to a poster talking about sacrifice:

When I said before, about something not being a sacrifice- when you have a personal investment, and that investment is not borne out of some kind of low agenda, or manipulation, deception, personal gain or avoidance of work for its own sake- it is not a sacrifice. Working for something worth saving, the past, the present and the future is a true privilege. It is an honor and reward.

M_window

Once you walk this path,there is no escape.If you take love with you,

it might turn to hate.

Call it a game,

but there is no win or lose.

You get what you give,

you give what you choose.

(chorus)
Sorcerer, the winds are howling,

Sorcerer can’t you hear me calling?

I opened the gates

and now

I’m falling.

Did you do this to me,

did you throw away the key?

Tell me, tell me,

won’t you set me free, Sorcerer?

        I wrapped myself in black,

then wrapped myself in white.

I’ve walked the left ,

and I’ve walked the right.

        I’ve been frozen

and I’ve been burned.

I have forgotten..

and I have learned..

 (chorus)

oh , Sorcerer….

the winds are howling,

Sorcerer ,can’t you hear me calling?

I opened the gates

and now

I’m falling.

Did you do this to me,

did you throw away the key?

Tell me, tell me,

Won’t you set me free, Sorcerer?

kiss

Fuseli_nightmare

Was ich kann und was ich könnte
(What I can do and what I could do)
Weiss ich gar nicht mehr
(I just don’t know anymore)
Gib mir wieder etwas schönes
(Give me something beautiful again)
Zieh mich aus dem Meer
(Drag me from the sea)
Ich höre dich rufen, Marian
(I hear you calling Marian)
Kannst du mich schreien hören
(Can you hear me calling?)
Ich bin hier allein
(I am here alone)
Ich höre dich rufen, Marian
(I hear you calling Marian)
Ohne deine hilfe verliere ich mich in diesem Ort
(Without your help I am lost in this place)

“Marian”
Sisters of Mercy,1985

    In our cause, for preserving and continuation of our people, of what we have created, we talk so much about the past.  About what our forebearers have created, achieved, invented, discovered, composed, built, written- modes of thought, belief systems- almost anything that ever amounted to anything big and lasting was created   “by us for us”.

I was thinking about a scene from the movie “Educating Rita”, where the main character’s mother sits forlornly in a bar  in  England where everyone else is drinking and singing. She says “There must be better songs to sing than this”.

Have we arrived at the same conclusion? Have we now just taken to chewing our own political “cud” , as it were?   Of course we still want the same things. Of course we still believe the same things.  I don’t believe all that differently than “before” I  learned more about politics, and came to see my beliefs were considered a “fringe ideology” or “extreme right”, though somehow I doubt it fits into the concepts of right/left, I got that early on. 

I try to look at ideas, people,  concepts- not just for what they seem to be, but the path that led them there. The same thing with the  folks who trot out the old ” We are the sculptors, we are the  architects of civilization…” I have even said as much myself in the recent  past years, though I already knew this quite well, and knew whom I was telling  certainly must know it as well.  Was it affirmation I was looking for?  We KNOW this.

Now I look to the WHY and HOW all those great things were created. In facing a “new era”  of  my own autonomy, I again see myself as part of the whole.  I  close my eyes and see the past, sometimes very far back, to when we had autonomy as a people, what the world was like when all the  things aforementioned were created. 

In those days,  before “political correctness”,  men could feel good about conquering, building and settling a land, not fearful or ashamed. Women also  were not so unsure of who they were, whether or not they chose a “traditional path” they did not have external pressure from TV or magazines about what we  should be like, and there was no memes of “can we have it all?” whith the accompanying pressure that we probably should try to always do more, be more, wear the pants and every hat we could fit on our heads.

We didn’t have to contend with  this :

http://www.usatvads.net/html/screenindex.html

telling us   we could “bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan- and never, ever let you forget your a man, etc..”

In days past, we could just “be” what we were, and be inspired by that.  I look at the lack of  great things created these days , with the exception of technology and see that there is not many “spirit created”  things as compared to then- this is especially sad because if  our people were not too busy worrying about paying off their credit cards, divorce lawyers, being “outsourced” by illegals or India,   being taxed insanely for a government that looks out only for the interests of their masters, and an underclass that has not been “lifted up” by the help- if were were not struggling with our children being influenced by MTV, fashion, anorexia, cutting themselves, apathetic, materialistic and so on.. if we did not have all these things to worry about, what great things would be being created today that are not?

Would we create like we did then? Would we fight like we did then? Love like we did then? Can we still?

Dad, it was my mistake to think he would be like you,

just because he wasn’t my usual type.

You loved me since I was born.

Maybe he never did.

and now?

Feel like a thief who can no longer steal

nursing wounds that do not heal.

Dressed in black yet still a bride.

and like you , a heart that does not hide.

Mama is angry. (Capulet vs Capulet)

So are you but not at me.

You both didn’t like his people.

Years pass,

Romeo hates Juliet.

Doesn’t that sound like the latest fiction title from someone who would then appear on Oprah?
I was looking in the 25 cent room at the library where I have found some treasures and found an endless supply of this type of title, which follows a formula: career/trade/some kind of job description, then adjective or verb, then noun, preferably a person. It almost seems there could be generators for these titles . “The Bondswoman’s Perishable Apple -Butter”.. One starts thinking this way after seeing one after another of these. It is not even homey or kitschy, there is absolutely nothing to assign it to, such as “Aha, this person is probably into latch hook rugs and scrapbooking”.. Trite imitates art?

And this is what our lives have become, a series of “LOL’s” and “BTW”, hateful concepts such as “friends with benefits” and “soul mates”, “myspace friends” rather than saying hello to your neighbor.. In this false anti-world, there can exist no Cathy and Heathcliff, we have been told that is passe, that depth is unrewarding and too much work, living “in the moment” is all, and ” What have you done for me lately?” (Janet Jackson) and “How’s that working for ya?” (Dr. Phil) have replaced what used to be called, “introspection” or “looking within”.

How has this happened, the “shallowization” of America?

Channon. Chris.Thinking of this
Must open the window
I feel the retching asphyxia of one who knows
they were told a lie.
Here, at the very end of the earth-
It is still safe in one’s car…
to cry.

“Don’t look” says the boy. “close your eyes!”
(in this part of the loop)
she also cries.
Sobs, pleading, and finally , the bargaining.
There will be no compromise.

Another “sleep”

Another “round”

(” I will get through this. I want to live. What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” ” I will come out of this alive”)
For she is young, and these comfort her.

No punishment is forgotten.
When they tire of her flesh,
The last hours they try to steal her will, her spirit, her dignity
They succeed.

Now she is praying.
Some verse I have heard before.
“Please, let this end”..
She thanks her parents,
asks God to take care of them,
Christopher’s face.

A winter rope swing ..
off a precipice
Unties.
She flies. (“i’m free, I can breathe!”)
The endless horizon , summerland sky.

The black, fixed in the camera
in the blue of her eyes.

Up from the hold I stagger forth
He’s at the helm, we’re heading North
laid to waste, so many lie dead
We have wine, but have no bread..

So let us drink, try not to drown
Ill tell you the story
‘fore Thor strikes us down..

Saxons ship I saw from shore
Ran to my home,
He would not open the door
He took our boy, pushed my grown son outside
laughing said
“now try to find a place and hide.”.
His eyes so dark and full of hate, as he said,
“if it’s not too late”

Before I could turn my back
I heard the clink of a battle axe.
He stood before me full height
face in armor, yet I knew the eyes

” You take her away, my Northern friend,
I love her not,
perhaps you can”..
He pulled some gold from his coat
“for your trouble, and she’s getting old”..

He cast the bag of gold aside
and said
“ask the woman if she is surprised”..

“Here she has waited for me
watch her go willingly.
I should right now strike you down,
but having already sacked your town
I’ll take this woman and her sons
Do not resist, and the matter is done”…

My husband stooped
picked up the bag
spun me round
“You know this man?”

I then shook loose his grip
he who once was at least a friend
The Norseman stepped between us then

“She thought me dead
I did come back
but she was wed & with child

Then talk spread through the land
that you are not all that you pretend
You dont deserve her love
you cant buy honorable intent.

I thought then it better
to stay dead and bide my time
Things have changed
What you cast away is mine”

The heavy man backed up to the door, asked
“Do you mean to say the young man is yours?”
He laughed again, shook his head
“I’ll lay odds he is not, wager a bet?
while he is fair , with eyes of blue
Rest assured he belongs not to you.
Come with me , we will turn the earth
and dig up the sire of his birth”

“Please leave us lady” said the northern man
This I did and took my grown son.
I could not speak
I knew I would lose my little one

The stranger removed his headpiece
mano a mano eye to eye
“Cagnazzo, with your fine palazzo
I pity you, my Roman “friend”
May we never meet again
You keep your son by blood
he is the only love you truly have.
You were but this woman’s crutch-
for all your size, she held you up”….

A gladiator
of a woman
she dreams
of ruling new Empires
by his side

Sacrifices, a given
as many tears as drops of blood
are shed
We run through fields
as children sleep in their beds

I will not become my enemy
greedy grasping
avaricious
harpies all

yet i still desire to win, the crown
(it’s in my blood)
Victory as sweet a taste
as any mead or wine
but for your kiss
I will yield
now , as then

He was colors of nature, the sun, the sky
in his hair and eyes
I looked on him and felt my cold heart
not warm
but beat

memory and thought
pale as moonlight
I dreamed him
perhaps I saw more than was there
clouds were gathering

I felt him try to hold me yet
he went through me
like a specter
but close enough
to the past
that he made me feel
that old wound
that old scar
we were salty he and I
his sweat
but me who always cries
after the wild hunt
the death of the stag

I couldnt give him
immortality like most women-
in form, in a new creation..
for
I am thousands of years old-
I dwell
where winter winds rustle
blowing endless pine needles
everywhere
I lean out
my dark hair flying
a mournful screech
the ravens alight awkwardly
all around
on branches
awaiting
longing

Was he a soldier
or spectre?
a vessel in troubled seas?
like a sweet child
without responsibilities,
he appeared to me.
Father,can you absolve me, please
though I will not repent-
nor weep for him,
only for me.
I’ve been brought to my knees
there’s no dignity in this grief.
The wound is deep
though I don’t bleed.
I loved well (and yet still love)
though some would say foolishly.
for the Scarlet W I now wear is
a sign no sympathy be shared.

No matter this,
I wish him well and
never harm
he wore my favor on his arm
the sun forever on him shone
whatever pain best bore alone.

We will one day see eye to eye
where I will as ravens, fly!
to take you to ultima Thule
each day battle, fall,
yet rise again.
My love will be as new even then.

ours is not a tragic tale
for I am with you
bound to you through centuries and eons
I lean and touched the earth today
on the shore , my feet bare
and knew somewhere you also
touched earth
infinitesimal original life forms,
grains falling away
also eons old
caressing me
I lie down covered
in its ancient essence
salt and earth, shell and bone
the waves came upon me
rhythmic , roaring
I try to hold
what cannot be contained
yet still surrounds
I sink in the sand.. and surrender
I will fight you no more Poseidon

Here all is salt water
Iron becomes rust
Fire burns hot
blood runs thick

I stood by the rails, the sea to soothe me
The sky full of light of stars, the moon
cast shadows
rain in my eyelashes
I knew then who had captured me
Electricity surrounded me
My hair bound back
like a horses tail..
bristled, and
gulls wailed

Out on the water I heard the death knell
of my old life in multi culti hell
and wondered
Now where will I go
When I become an outcast here?
I held the metal in the storm
Yet had no fear

I can’t explain how it came to me,
(not just this ,but many things)
then I stopped fighting
what I knew would be.
I give myself in totality..

oh what I thought was “good works”
the stupidity, the danger
Polish my “halo”
help another stranger

These days I find myself
only half here,
no I believe myself still sane
the other half works on other planes
There’s much magic in our souls

Soldiers, Dragons, comrades all
I bleed but feel no pain
I will not fall
though I am daily raked across the coals.

For you I do not “tolerate”
but rather hold in a tight embrace
Now I am tired from so much flight
I bid you all a sweet goodnight..

He has summoned me agian
never fails,he likes routine.
Shall I sing a song I ask..
Shall we dance?
I do nothing,
still he is entertained.

Tap. Tap. Tap.
go his boots-
then his cigarette.
He tells me things, though I never ask.
He says “why not? people know we are together anyway”..
What part of our time should I forget?
My heart cracks as he says,
“All of it”..

He says he will send me someplace
where I will always be safe.
Each time I kiss him
my eyes change color, tears blur.
He takes my hands
upon them slides gloves of fur.
I say,”I’m not that cold”..

It’s then I know, begin to surmise
looking up into cerulean or is it cornflower eyes?
The gloves weren’t for where I am,or where I’ve been
but for where I’m going

But that night, I go back to my rooms
in pursuit of the ever elusive Morpheus
I’m dreaming of places
things are just as they seem-
no codes, signs, or mystery.
Will it be easier this way?
Alone in unfamiliarity?
Make it easier now I pray..