And I’m dancing with myself
Oh dancing with myself
Oh dancing with myself
Well there’s nothing to lose
And there’s nothing to prove
I’ll be dancing with myself – Billy Idol

Actually, that is not entirely accurate , the Idol  song quote as it applies to this- he’s not  dancin with himself, he’s not dancing with wolves, he’s dancin with the the deck furniture ! I  shyt you not. The video is funny . The guy gets down and funky  in broad daylight, prompting neighbors to say , “OMG, what about the children?” .

 Lawn chairs are not at risk, article states.


 Police in Ohio say that a married father of three has confessed to repeatedly having sex with his patio picnic table.

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Art Price, Jr., 40, has been charged with four counts of public indecency after a neighbor videotaped him getting all nasty with the umbrella hole in the middle of his plastic picnic table. Apparently preferring the table’s legs in the air, Price reportedly flipped the table over before forcing himself inside of it.


One thought on “Dept. OMG: Man Gets Over-Friendly w/Patio Table

  1. had to update you on this earlier post regarding this would-be Knight of The Round Patio Table.

    Trivia : mensa, the Latin word for “table,” indicates that it is a round-table society of equals.

    OK, kids, how many times have I told you Equal is a Social Construct and doesn’t really exist? But Patio-Perverts DO exist!

    Charges have been dropped against the man who was accused of repeatedly having sex with a picnic table while naked in broad daylight – but he may yet face prosecution over the alleged table-sexing.

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