The Spoils of War

I would think it would be tempting, in the wake of losing your child, to avoid listening to anyone, to shut down and simply soldier on resolutely. Particularly to try and defend what is left of your child’s existence, to provide a last bastion of refuge at least for their memory, to shelter and protect them in death, away from the insanity and evil that stole them away, that which exists not only in the unrevised versions of fairy tales.
In those, there is usually a lesson learned , or some moral point the story tries to make by use of fantasy, exaggeration, monsters. The story of Channon and Christopher is no Grimm’s or Andersen’s. It is real. It is as awful and horrifying as it gets. Still, I am hoping something can be gleaned from this. I phrase it that way because I don’t think telling the obvious part is telling you something you don’t know.

Creatures than come out of the darkness and accost the innocent, and violate them are evil. We know this. There was never any excuses made in fairy tales why devils and monsters hurt and kill people, or mention of “it just happened” or that (usually) children , who were the victims, were “in the wrong place at the wrong time”. No one was ever “in the wrong place at the wrong time”. It is Grendel , it is Baba Yaga, Gollum- it is the monsters who seek out their victims who look for innocence, who look for prey. The cliches that people use today to make themselves feel better did not apply then- and they still don’t. The fact that Grendels, and Deep Ones exist in human form does not make them less evil or dangerous. You know this. No one ever pointed the finger at Hansel and Gretel, or said “well , stuff happens”. The reason children are enthralled by these stories is because we all innately know danger is real, evil exists, and it is not random, it does not “just happen”, as in “rarely” or “once in a blue moon”. It happens ALL the time. Perhaps THEN, in medieval times and in pre-Christian history it DID only happen once in a blue moon, but parents did not falsely tell their children they were safe when in fact, they were not.

These kind of monsters are not “villains”. Villains are clever and evil, pre-meditated, and usually have some kind of “debonair charm” , no matter how silly or cartoonish they come across.
Monsters are never this way, hardly ever unique in their ugliness and violence.

Villains do not kill simply because they can, most times. That would be the monsters.
The true villains have co-opted our media, our private lives, our sense of who and what we are.
They tell us that monsters are good for us, our “strength” as it were, and send more and more of them to our lands.

If you are at all familiar with the Grail Mythos, you know that the land and people can never be well while the King ails. When he suffers, all suffer in turn, when he is strong, peace prevails. I realize some don’t have much patience for analogy and myth. But those things are from where we come from, they are ancient truths, more true than what you will get on FOX or MTV. In the Grail myth, there are many versions, but in all the King or Knight sustains a wound that takes away his power- his power as a man. I believe this is what has happened to us. We have been told what to believe, we have lain down our arms, we have made martyrs and eunuchs of our people, and become shadows of ourselves, slaves to lies.

Eventually the King regains health , and takes back the reins of power- says “enough is enough”, and begins again. I have heard the steps of the horses . I have heard the voices of men, at least three in the last few weeks, three who are looking forward to the battle, and one who says he does not fear death. I am afraid for them, yet at the same time, it quickens my heart, and brings a knot to my stomach, and tears to my eyes to know it is not only words.

Some day these men will make us free once more. There will be no more monsters, and no more villains. No more wars based on lies and agendas, no more constant lies and deceit- To get there I know there will be pain, and most likely blood, but in the end there will be joy and peace.

I long to live to see that day.